…and all parties are better for it.
When things hit the fan, who can put them all back into place better than You? I think I got the message.
Don’t let my pride get in the way of Your best. We all need humbling experiences, even if they hurt a little {or a lot}. When the Big O catches wind, I ask that he be understanding. You know I’d love to be forgiven what I did, but Xavier didn’t seem willing to me.
I pray that You would keep growing me into good relationships with the people that belong in my life, letting me remember the blessings they have all been. God, show me where the hard ones are blessings. My head gets tough, I know.
God, help me with the violent streak thats been hitting me lately. I can’t seem to get past it, and today was proof that it’s not going anywhere on it’s own. The Statement’s getting old. It’s really not funny anymore. I can’t change without Your help. There is no excuse. Although I’ve pretty much ruined any chance of You using me here, I plead forgiveness and healing.
Is it this hard for everyone that takes the Walk? Do others just hide it better? I try to trust You, and end up ripping out of Your hands the very things I just claimed to release to You. It’s hard, Lord. I wonder why You evr called me to believe, yet I have no doubt You’re here.
The Queen lost control, and the jester took the crown, only to realize that he had taken the place a little too well. When the King came back, the Idiot decided the conditions of his station weren’t conducive to his lifestyle, and left promptly. The Queen covered her bruises as if nothing ever happened, moved to the River, and refused to trust the King again.
Maybe it could be a series…
This is an update of the Angela network.
In ministry news, I am now in charge of follow-up on our Prayer Requests. I will follow that up with times to pray for them. Our church is participating in Neighborhood Connections, and I have 11 homes to visit tomorrow, after breakfast with the Bruce, who I haven’t seen in quite a few months.
Prayer requests:
Underlying all these requests is that God’s will be done.
The health of Cathi and her baby, who is probably a few hours old right now.
The health of the Martinez clan. The health of the House clan. The health of pretty much everyone at Revelation.
The replacement of our Children’s Director; should I try to fill the gap or just teach?
Our Outreach Programs: Neighborhood Connections, Outpost Groups, and possible International Outreach.
My place in God’s will.
Numbers 6:24The LORD bless you and keep you;
25the LORD make his face to shine upon you and be gracious to you;
26the LORD lift up his countenance upon you and give you peace.
Of course, everybody knew I would have comments on Ted;At this time, all I can do is pray for him. It doesn’t matter to me what exactly he’s guilty of, just that he stops lying, for his own good. I pray that his church is able to thrive without him, and i pray that Ross is ready for the shoes he is filling, even temporarily, up to permanant. I especially lift up the people who want to give up on their relationships with God because of this situation.
As I am considering the actions of my own pastor, the actions of my church family, and attendance issues, I add to the list the possibilty of attending New Life. I’ve heard Ross’s sermons, and I pray for his safekeeping, and that You protect him from human nature, as he relies on You.
I also lift up the congregation of New Life; that they would rely on You, and not get caught up in the “why’s” and the “How could this happen”’s. Lord, strengthen my friends in their faith, for You are good.
You are good all the time and all the time You are good. Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those that {we assume} trespass against us.
Thank You, God, for hearing my prayers.
Seriously, is it? Can you even call it love? What about unrequited love? Do we tend to love only those who love us, or is it posiible to get past that? If your friend is “interested” in you, do you not return their calls if you don’t feel the same; do you just attempt to leave it alone? Is the friendship stronger than that? Is it worth trying to salvage the friendship without going into that? Honestly, these are my questions.
While I try not to assume anything in not hearing from the person in question, it’s difficult. Especially when the reply is just to set a date to talk thru it, not a commitment either way. I guess the real questions are can I handle his answer when he gives it, and where do we go from there. As unhappy as it would make most people that know me, I don’t care. Apparently he doesn’t deserve what I give, but they don’t know what I’ve put him thru. Ya know what, scratch that, we’re about even. Well, not anymore, but at least I didn’t ask him in front of his other friends or try to find out from someone else.
Relationships are hard enough without trying for drama. Now I wonder if I did the right thing in telling him. While others assure me that, “At least you know the answer”, “You won’t wonder later”, and other great quips such as that, what if he decides that our friendship isn’t even worth it. I mean, we just started talking again. So, while i pick up the pieces and wait ’til I know all the damage is done, How are you, world?
As far as prayer goes, that God shows me purpose beyond myself, that my life be centered around Him, and that I’ll be able to visit my family for Thanksgiving. God bless.
Filed under: prayer requests
I’ve realized this week that I am having problems. serious problems.Like, for instance, getting mad at a flippin tablecloth. God, I thank you for letting me find a job that will pay the bills and allow me to move. I thank you for the friends. I especially am thankful for being able to move and that y farrier business is still growing.
I pray for your guidance in the decisions I am faced with and the wisdom to handle them well. How I wish I never picked up that first cigarette, but I did. Lord, help me to quit. Don’t let me be dissuaded when I do. In Jesus’ Name I lift up these requests.
God, help me to be the friend I need to be. Show me how to give my all for your glory.
Bless the Boggs in their retirement years. Thank you for their blessings on our nation.
Thank you for the survival of the Gardners. Let them find the right transportation.
Thank you for Gretchen, Lord, I really enjoyed her company last week. Help her to be a badge of honor.
Thank you for the Olivers. Let Lucky and Amanda raise this, their firstborn, in your service.
Thank you for the techies, Brandon and Laura.
Thank you, especially, for the House, for being great hosts and leaders.
Thank you, God, that I am not ashamed to be honest, but delight in Truth and love.
Thank you, Lord, for Bruce. Please provide more opportunities for us to spend time together and show him what he means to You.
Thank you for your son, the Ultimate sacrifice, our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.
Thank you for Mark, for everything he is and what he’s trying to be.
Thank you for the Dunns, what great servant-leaders!
God, thank you for employment and intermediary cash.
Thank you for the blessing of Christi and Justin, and the worship team.
Thank you for the Graham crackers and Delta for providing me food and shelter for two weeks. A kind of working vacation from Camp Lozano. May the transition be seamless.
God, thank you for all of these peole you have put in my life. Bless theirs as they have blessed mine.
Reach your hand out to those who don’t know you, strengthen your flock, and let us joyfully serve you.
When things go wrong, when they don't go as planned, when everything in life is hard to understand. When you can't seem to find the light, when everything's so dark, when the spark is gone and the tunnel black, you can't seem to find your way back. you turn around and see a dim glimmer. It's then that you realize you're standing on tracks and the light, well honey, it's a train. The funny thing is, you're just too tired. Too much running in your own way, not heeding the warnings, taking it as it comes, serving no purpose. So tired, yet not wanting to lose, not wanting to submit to another's plan. What if it doesn't work? What if I am scorned? What if I get lost again? Is this way working? Do I have the strength to continue on this path? I could get off the track…Oh, no the train!! It's passed? Yes, it's passed, and with it the storm. What is this peace that I've never had before? Could it be you, my Lord? Thank you, God for everything you have blessed me with.
Divine intervention is a wonderful thing. Now, for the hazy days. As far as I remember I got a lot of sun, cuz it hurts. I painted a lot of faces Saturday, and helped start a fence. At church, our whole class seemed totally uncooperative, but we got through it. After that, we put the pickets on the fence, and had Chinese food and some drinks. I found it interesting that when people do something for free, they think workmanship is not important. This saddens me, but I let it go to God.
Surprisingly, I've given a lot of time to thinking about the future and my friendships. Sometimes, it just means more to hang out than talking on the phone. Sometimes, wasting time is not a waste. Sometimes, scheduling wastes time. All the time God is in control.
I have been surrounded more and more by kids, and I came to the realization that if i never get married and never have kids, that the world would not end. It's become like an actual possiblity that maybe I could do better with the kids I have a part in if I'm not distracted. Of course, thisw doesn't make the want any less. I was told on Sunday that in China, it's illegal to adopt your children out, so they just abandon them. I was told of an 8-year old deaf/mute dumped at a train station and I just couldn't hold in the anger and frustration. My son would've been 8 in October, and I don't know why I lost him. I look at my oldst niece, and the emotion becomes overwhelming.
There's so much I want to say, but I have run out of time. Pray for healing in my life. Pray for my friend Bruce, who is going thru a hard time. Pray for God's blessings in our city, state, country, and world. God strengthen those who serve you to always be faithful in a dark world.
Filed under: prayer requests
So much has been happening in the world these last few weeks. I'll start with the prayer requests:
Bruce: The perserverance, that no matter what happens, he keeps plugging away with his music. That God's blessings follow him to the top. That he sees God at work in his life.
Revelation: that our church stays in God's will and that none fall away when things get tough, but that we grow in our faith and compassion.
The Kids: that Jennifer and I lead them down the right paths to knowing God, trusting Him, and growing to be pillars of the community.
Myself: Not to lose focus, not to let the things of life bury me, as my faith grows, and not to let anyone come between me and God. I also pray for strength through temptations, for I know that I am weak and the attacks will not slow down as long as I keep fighting. I just need to keep fighting. Life is hard, but Godis good. That my relationships be strong and that I never become a fairweather friend. As i have the next couple of weeks off, that my last paycheck keeps me afloat until my first one from the AFA comes in.
Jeremy and Nikki: that God keeps their bond strong as they nurture and teach Benjamin and each other a love that stands.
Annette: my mom, though she has her own ideas of God, that He will lead her.
Bob: my dad, to stay a man of God, even if he never gets into office, or has some obstacles along the way.
Ken: I pray he will let go of the fear and trust God more fully.
Felix and Angelique: their five kidsand baby on the way will each know that they aare loved and that their family blends well together.
Gabriel: that he comes to know God as I do, and loves Him as much as I do.
Aron: either reconciliation with his wife or, just Gods will for him to happen.
Lisa: baby sis. a strengthened faith in God, the one who will never leave her or forsake her.
Jennifer:older sis. to not let her anger get the best of her at any time and a stronger bond in er marriage.
Martha:since I'm gonna be home a lot this next couple of weeks, that we still can appreciate each other despite our differences.
Mark:As he grows, I have become so proud of him.God, keep him and show him the way.
The Hopkins: that they return soon to Revelation, but mostly God's continued blessings.
I have been reminded what faith is this week:it is the belief that God is in control and everything will work out for good, as He sees fit. As I reflect on this past week, with my car having had issues and me overbooking my schedule, everything still fell into place.
At Felix's birthday party, I had a chance to get to know others a little more and hope we can all stay friends thru the years. As hard as it usually is for me to be comfortable around new people, we had a blast. As the night wore down, I realized that it just all fell together, even though it was difficult. In Charles and Cherra I saw what long term commitment is. In Felix, what a serving husband looks like while being a man with a backbone. In Gabe, time will tell with him, although so far he seems to be a very caring person.
In closing, I just hope to stay focused on the important things, and let things happen in God's time.
We had our drive for the Pregnancy Center today. I also got to speak a little more in-depth with one of my fellow warriors;and the world gets smaller and smaller. We spoke of his unwillingness to be out from behind the table, and in between handing out lists, we talked about stereotypes. It seems the past has been forgiven, once again. I have to say I am proud of him for stepping out of his comfort zone, and it was also nice just to chat with him, as we didn't get started off on the right foot. More interesting things happened than I counted on.
For example, I bought some earrings not too long ago, the chinese symbol for love. How odd that someone at church would have a tattoo of it on his arm. I get to be a face painter for the Walk for Life this year, also. The pregnancy Center has openings for volunteers as well as for paid work.
Mark and Ken cleaned out our garage,for which I am so proud of Mark for getting past the laziness thing. As for Ken, well, he's still Ken. It seems he's still concerned with my opinion of him, for whatever reason. Their are few things sadder to me than a fear of others' opinions of you, especially in guy-girl relationships. Even if the guy is not really interested, for the most part, he's literally afraid of what the girl thinks of him. This leads me to believe that most "serious" relationships are sadly built on familiarity and not too much on love. "He was there, and I was there, so…" Ooh, sounds like fun all around.
Not that I have a lot of room to talk. Miss "Been on one date since moving out here", and coming out of a long-term brain fart, oh, I mean, relationship. And the fact that the people I live with are the least familiar with me, and also afraid of what I think of them. Ugh. It can't just be me. Seriously, what makes me so scary? Because I don't keep my thoughts secret , ro take a poll? Have mercy.
Anyway, blessings are coming at breakneck speeds, including the numerous donations today, meeting new people, getting to know others better, seeing God at work in my life, and His work in others' lives as well. That's it for now.
Filed under: prayer requests
We lift him up to the healer of everything, and ask for wisdom and discernment on what he's going through. Hang in there, Bruce. Also, for patience on the journey.
